I have found there are 2 types of people: those that love the holidays and those that hate/abhor (inset your word for dislike) the holidays. Therefore, you're either an Annie or a Tommy. If you know us as a couple, then you know I love love love the holidays while Tom, eh, not so much. However, there are similarities between the two especially when it comes to the coping mechanisms you can and should use to deal with the Crazies at the holiday time.
1. Watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade - Why? Because you're an American. The Pilgrims watched the parade in their day...except their parade probably consisted of holding the Native Americans at gun point, making them walk up and down Plymouth Avenue, pretending to be the Rockettes or some stupid high school marching band...Just sayin'
2. Make and keep your own traditions - A girlfriend of mine has a pre-Thanksgiving Happy Hour at her favorite watering hole which involves a group of individuals who only have one person in common getting together to commiserate the upcoming day with complete strangers. My cousin, also a creature of habit, feels most comfortable staying in on for Black Friday. Apparently, she enjoys being a recluse. Very similar to the mother/daughter combo on Long Island, Jackie O's crazy socialite cousins. Having tradition is important even if it means sitting in your favorite chair while drinking a Pinot Noir thinking evil thoughts about people.
3. Enjoy the quiet time - Whether its before or after the storm of poo that you've ensued, enjoy the quiet. My mother loved this time on Thanksgiving Day. She would wait until Johnny and I were asleep and she would get the paper with all the ads (this was before Black Friday was called Black Friday) and would reflect on her day of fabulousness in the kitchen. She would do this with her big blonde hair still perfect while in her perfect outfit from Saks Fifth Avenue. I do the same thing except it IS Black Friday and while my hair is big and fabulous, I'm doing number 5 while planning on doing number 4 at Target or Old Navy.
4. Always throw elbows - I don't care if you are at the Thanksgiving table or at Target. Sometimes a bitch needs a fat lip.
5. Drink massive amounts of alcohol - Because hey, alcohol helps any situation go from crappy to craptastic or craptastic to fabulous.
Remember to be thankful this holiday season as you have much to be thankful for. I am eternally thankful for my loving husband, my adorable son, my evil sense of humor, my wonderful family, my bottles of Pinot and my fabulous friends.
Happy Thanksgiving!!!
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