Monday was always the ugly stepsister of the bunch.

Monday was always the ugly stepsister of the bunch...

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Suze Orman vs. Annie Orman (Hint: I'm a better bet)

Ah, Ladies and Gentlemen, that time of year is upon us. The time of year when you are masticating on pencils and drinking massive amounts of alcohol not to mention yelling obscenities at your spouse. No, I'm not talking about the holiday season. I'm talking about tax time. Tomorrow, Monday, April 18, is a day where you are either a top or bottom. You are getting while the getting is good or are begging for mercy (what? too soon?) What gets me is that people get excited about their tax refund. Hello, he-who-has-no-brains! This is your money!!! You didn't win the freakin' lottery. This is YOUR money that THEY have had tax-free. Here's my deal-if they get to mess with us, why can't we mess with them? Isn't turnabout supposed to be fair play? Apparently not because the IRS is an entity that is hated more than Osama bin Laden. Seriously, I'd much rather have him over for dinner than some jack-off from the IRS.

Every year at tax time, people always say that they will make better financial decisions next year but never do. So, for this weeks blog I have decided to share a few tips that are ingenious enough to maybe make you be a better and more financially sound individual.

1. Listen to your gut - This has nothing to do with relatives borrowing money. This has to do with Starbucks charging $9 dollars for 16 ounces of a 500 calorie drink. Stop lying to yourself, there is no such thing as a Skinny Vanilla Latte if you are eating a cookie along with it.

2. Protect your ass-ets that is - Always, always look out for number one so you don't step in number two (thank you Mr. Dangerfield). Seriously, if you don't have a good retirement but have money for your children's college fund, something might be wrong. There are no such things as retirement loans.

3. The Blame Game makes you Lame - If you know more about the Kardashians or American Idol than the financial world, you are LAME. When you don't feel confident in your knowledge of how money works, you'll blame everyone under the sun when you develop a toxic pattern of bad financial decisions. Here's a hint: that inheritance can only go so far.

Please know that I am really great at dispensing this type of advice but have no plans whatsoever to follow my own advice. Have a fabulous week! I'm off to watch Keeping up with the Kardashians.

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